What's Left Of Me
by Dakota0190
Summary: Ashley is performing live for the first time since her father's death; Spencer a huge fan of Ashley's shows up at the club where Ash is performing with her girlfriend. As their lives become intertwined, they realize how badly they need each other.


**A/N: Okay, so I had an idea for something a little different, but ended up with this instead. It's a little dark, and deals with a relationship between two women; so if either one of those things bothers you, then this isn't the place for you. :P If you do decide to read, please take the time to review. I would like to get at least 5-8 reviews for each chapter before I post the next one…just so I know I have an audience and I'm not wasting my time. So if you R&R…I'll love you forever! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own South of Nowhere or the characters. The only thing that belongs to me is the plot. Maybe one day, Tom Lynch will get generous and share. Who knows?**

**Chapter One**

**((Ashley's POV))**

"God, if someone doesn't shut this woman up…I swear, my organs will begin to fail me and my life will be cut short by this woman's inability to speak anything of importance. Why the hell do I need to know how to add letters Ky?" Kyla shushed me before turning her attention back up to the front. Once Mrs. Reese began back with her nonsense, Kyla responded in the form of a whisper.

"Number one, it is 'of importance'. Number two, you learned how to 'add numbers' three years ago. In case you haven't noticed, you're in trig now. And number three, if you don't stop being a drama queen, I am going to be forced to bluntly inform you that you are becoming more and more, dare I say, like your mother." I looked at her in shock. Being compared to Christine was not something I took lightly. In any other situation, I would have taken this opportunity to throw a few low blows back at my half-sister; however, the bell rang, and my car seemed slightly more important at the moment.

"Hey Ash!" I heard Aiden yell as I darted out of King High. _Damn! So close. _I turned around to be greeted by the familiar raven hair and green eyes that I'd grown to love and hate. More hate than anything, but hey, I'm trying to be optimistic.

"Hey Aiden."

"So will I see you at the Grey tonight?" he asked with a smile. I have to give it to the guy. He's hot. I would definitely give him a shot…if I was into guys that is. Oh and if he wasn't currently dating my sister.

"Yea, I'll be there. I'm actually playing tonight," I informed him.

"Way to go Ash! Jumping back up there with the best of em. I'm proud of you."

"Well, don't throw a party just yet. I'm taking it one step at a time. If tonight is a disaster, I'm throwing in the towel for good."

"You'll be fine," he assured. "Well hey, I'm gunna get goin, but I'll see you tonight." He smiled and headed for his jeep while I continued my way to my own pride and joy. Since I had the luxury of having the day off, I had the whole afternoon to figure out what I was going to wear tonight. I work as a tech at a hospital nearby. I basically run around checking people's blood pressure and temperatures, pretending like I know what's done with the information after I hand it over to the doctors. Most people don't see me as someone that fits the description of…what would you call it….? A people person? But I love it.

Although I'd never admit it aloud, I am totally freaking out about tonight. What the hell am I doing anyways? I can't do this without dad. God, I was so comfortable, playing guitar and singing along side him; but I was safe in his shadow, ya know? I don't know if I can do this by myself, but Kyla thinks it will be good for me; and for some ungodly reason, I trust her. So reluctantly, I decide on a short, blue jean skirt and brown tank top before making my way towards the Grey for sound check.

**--------------------**

Kyla and Aiden took it upon themselves to get there early to see me in all my glory. I give them a fake smile and sigh nervously as I make my way onto the stage. Nothing has ever felt more wrong. It's a little too late for me to stand here battling with my insecurities, so I quickly introduce myself and begin to strum the first chord. I see several guys out of the corner of my eye and can barely make out something along the lines of 'yea…that's Raife Davies's daughter.' I quickly block them out and begin singing one of my dad's songs. It only seemed right. Everyone started cheering me on when they heard my choice of song, and I slowly began to relax and smile as I sang.

The night went by pretty fast, and before I'd even realized it, I'd played ten songs and it was time for me to call the next band up. Several people came up for autographs afterward and I happily obliged. Maybe this wasn't such a bad idea after all.

"Ash! You were amazing!" Kyla screamed over the band that had begun to play.

"You were beyond amazing," Aiden corrected. "I'm totally buying you a drink." As we made our way over to the bar, Aiden ordered us all virgin drinks and I spiced them up with the contents of the flask in my purse. It was a common task. Aiden paid for the drinks and I provided the liquor that Christine would never notice was missing anyway. So there I was, indulging in meaningless conversation about how I was destined to be the next Raife Davies when I saw her. Not many people around here catch my eye. They all look the same; but this girl heading my way was definitely something to look at.

She was slightly taller than me, but only by an inch or two; with blonde hair and the bluest eyes I've ever seen. I've heard people say that the eyes are the windows to your soul. If that's true, this girl is a goddess. I don't waste any time turning my attention to her as she reaches the bar.

"You were amazing," she smiled. God, I could get lost in that smile. I smiled a thank you and held out my hand.

"Ashley Davies."

"Spencer Carlin," she replied, accepting my hand. I can see Aiden and Kyla smiling like idiots and nudging each other obnoxiously. "So are your friends ok?" she laughed.

"Oh yeah, they are just a little intoxicated," I quickly explained. "So you want a drink?"

"Actually, I should probably get back to my girlfriend," she replied. "I just wanted to come and congratulate you on your bounce back. I'm sorry to hear about your dad. But it was nice meeting you. I hope you play here again soon. We'll definitely be back."

"You too." I tried to hide the disappointment from my voice, but my failure was evident with the look she gave me before turning and walking away.

"That was interesting," Kyla teased as I turned back to my two laughing friends.

"I believe Ashley Davies was just rejected," Aiden chanted.

"And I believe Aiden Dennison is an idiot!" I shot back. "Look, if she wasn't already attached…" They both rolled their eyes before declaring that it was time to leave. "So what are you guys up to tonight?" I asked curiously, not really in the mood to head back to the house with Satan's accomplice…aka Christine.

"I think we are just gunna head to the movies and see what's playing," Kyla replied, looking at Aiden for confirmation. He nodded and they both looked back at me. "You wanna come?" There is absolutely no way in hell that I am going to a movie with those two. Last time I agreed to that, they were practically on top of each other and I was left sitting by myself, unable to figure out what freaked me out most; the guy peeling the skin off of his screaming victims, or my best friend and half sister sucking face right next to me.

"I think I'm gunna pass," I replied. "But you two have fun." As we said our goodbyes, I couldn't help but glance one more time and the gorgeous blonde who had turned down my offer. She was heading for the exit just ahead of me and I watched as the dark haired girl next to her intertwined their fingers as they made their way towards a yellow mustang GT. I sighed once again, wondering what it was that seemed so familiar about this girl before getting in my car and driving away.

**((Spencer's POV))**

I didn't even really want to come out tonight. I wanted to sit at home, rest, and watch re-runs of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Is that too much to ask? Apparently, Carmen thought it was. "Come on Spencer, this is all you have done lately. Where is that outgoing girl that I fell in love with last year?" she whined. I started to protest before realizing that she was right. Although I hadn't really been up to much lately, that didn't mean Carmen wasn't desperate to do something besides sit around and watch vampire slayers. Now that I say it like that…I definitely need to get out of this house.

"You win," I finally announce. "But I need a shower."

"Me too," she proclaimed, slightly lifting her eyebrow to clearly keep me aware of her intentions. I laughed before throwing my arms in the air for her to pull me out of my place in front of the television. Carmen and I have been together for almost two years now. She is great in almost every way. I can honestly say that the only downfall this girl has is her temper. She has a tendency to get a little hot-headed when things don't go her way; but I've learned how to deal with it. The good outweighs the bad, so I overlook that.

About two months ago, we decided it would be best to go ahead and move in together. My mom was becoming completely irrational about my relationship with Carmen. Surprisingly enough, it wasn't about the fact that I was dating another girl. She was forced to come to terms with that a long time ago; but let me tell you, that road wasn't a paved one either. She just didn't think that Carmen was right for me; mainly because of her dark past and anger issues. I was constantly trying to explain to her that she didn't know Carmen well enough to judge, but she never did accept it and I eventually ran out of energy to argue with her. I know she worries…she doesn't think I'm well enough to be living away from home; especially with someone that she doesn't trust will take care of me. But I'll be ok. I have to be ok.

"You ready to go baby?" Carmen called from the dining room.

"Yea," I replied, emerging from the back of the small, two-bedroom apartment.

"Damn." I laughed at her response to seeing me in my blue jean skirt and green tank top. I rarely dressed in anything besides sweats lately and I began to feel a little guilty at how much I'd deprived my girlfriend. I quickly grabbed my blue jean jacket and headed for the door. About twenty minutes later, we were walking in to the crowded club; trying our best to scope out a place to sit. Once we did, I was surprised to see none other than Ashley Davies walk up onto the stage and introduce herself!

"Omg! Did you know she was going to be playing here tonight?" I asked in excitement.

"Who?" Carmen questioned, looking at the stage.

"That's Raife Davies's daughter! God, I used to listen to her all the time. Didn't you hear? Her dad was in a car accident about four months ago. I can't believe she's playing again so soon!" Carmen laughed before making fun of my knowledge on celebrities. I quickly informed her that E! was a very informative channel which caused yet another eye roll from my girlfriend. The Davies girl looked a little nervous as she introduced herself and thanked everyone for coming out. However, when she started playing, it seemed as though she was as comfortable up there as ever. God, her voice is amazing.

I catch myself staring at her, and soon after catch Carmen's glaring eyes on my own. When she realizes that I've noticed, she quickly covers her emotions with a smile and asks if I want anything to drink. She knows I can't have anything with alcohol. The doctor is strictly forbidding it; but quickly obliges when I admit I wouldn't mind a bottle of water. I'm beginning to wonder if coming out tonight wasn't such a good idea after all. My eyes are having a hard time adjusting to the dim lighting and I'm relieved to see Carmen come back with my water in hand.

"Spence…are you okay?" she asks, the concern evident in her voice. I don't want to leave yet. I want to hear Ashley and I don't want to disappoint Carmen yet again.

"I'm fine…just a little tired."

"Well, did you take you medicine before we left the house?"

"Yep. I'm telling you, I'll be fine." Although the words were coming out of my own mouth, I wasn't so sure, and I was relieved when Carmen suggested that we leave once Ashley was done with her set. As she thanked everyone once again, and began exiting towards the bar, Carmen stood up to go retrieve our jackets. I'm not sure what gave me the courage to walk up and talk to her, but a part of me thought that this might be the last time I ever see her in person. I don't have a clue if she lives around here or if she's just doing a show, but either way…

"You were amazing." Oh my god, I did not just walk up to Ashley Davies and blurt like an idiot. I immediately feel ashamed for noticing that the slightly smaller girl is even hotter in person. She shot me the brightest smile I've ever seen before offering her hand and replying.

"Ashley Davies." I had to fight back the urge to laugh when she felt she had to tell me her name as I took her hand and informed her of mine. Who doesn't know her name? Well…Carmen didn't, but…Oh shit…if Carmen sees me talking to her the ride home will be hell. I see her friends giggling about something, but don't take much time to figure it out as Ashley mutters something about them having too much to drink. Then…I almost die when she offers me one. I almost lose the sense god gave me and accept before realizing that Carmen is probably waiting. I give her my most apologetic smile as I decline.

"I just wanted to come and congratulate you on your bounce back. I'm sorry to hear about your dad. But it was nice meeting you. I hope you play here again soon. We'll definitely be back." I immediately contemplate suicide right then and there when I realize that I just mentioned her dad's death. She doesn't seem to notice and I'm surprised to see that she actually seemed more taken back when I mentioned I had a girlfriend waiting. Strange. I don't take much time to think about it before heading back to find Carmen.

Thankfully, she's oblivious to the conversation that I just had with my idol. She just gently drapes my jacket over my shoulders and takes my hand as we make our way towards the exit. My eyes are coming in and out of focus and I can tell that more and more of my weight is being pressed against Carmen.

"Almost to the car baby. Just stay with me." I can barely hear her speak. As soon as she placed me in the passenger seat of her yellow mustang GT, I was out. I only woke when we arrived back at her apartment.

"Maybe we should stick to watching television for a few nights," she joked. I appreciated that she was trying to keep things as light-hearted as possible. I knew it was hard for her. I just smiled and gave her a nod, never looking into her eyes; knowing that I'd find her urge to fight back tears. Knowing that if I did find it, I wouldn't be able to control my own.

**So that's it for chapter one…please let me know what you guys think so I can decide whether a chapter two is in order…constructive criticism is always welcome!**


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